love and fuck. or is it fuck and love. or maybe it is fuck love.
this series is not about cursing or just dropping something to get attention. it is not about the rebellion of religion or the need to be looked at.
i do not release these works without a twinge of anxiety – without hesitation. my work is about love, mostly love for the underdog – the one’s who feel forgotten. so i pause and wonder if the meaning will be missed. will i lose in the end by filtering what i think someone might need to hear or be released from hiding now.
in a social setting i can say i love homemade apple crisp on a fall weekend night. i say i love a west coast sunrise and i also can say i love you. one word, similar meanings in reference yet carrying subtle and gigantic differences.
i can say or even mumble fuck i’m frustrated during an athletic competition – while at the same time be fucking fascinated with how it all fucking went down. or why my dude does something awesome smirk – that is fucking fantastic.
two contrasting words that can be used in a similar manner to communicate different feelings and emotions in context and in tone, with inflection and various other verbal clues. the sound of each word can reflect both pain and pleasure.
fuck i love her. fuck him. fuck me. fuck me. love me. i am in love.
verb. intransitive verb. adjective. part of an adverb. an enhancing adjective. a noun. part of another in-fucking-credible word.
or abso-fucking-lutely my personal favorite, fuuuuuuuuuuck.
growing up i wasn’t allowed to say fuck. i have still never sworn in front of my parents. no shit, no damn – at worst a gruntal aaaahhhhhh when i didn’t know what to say. my brother was fired from a job for using it in a meeting.
i am aware of its impact and the weight it carries.
i honestly am unsure of where i stand on its overuse and its place in everyday conversation and when it is appropriate and when it is not. its therapeutic effect is undeniable however and truthfully scary to admit around those that know me best.
i know we need love. i’m starting to believe that maybe we all need at least a little fuck.
in my little social artistic experiment i’m excited to see which one you are willing to pay for.